So, what is it you want to know? Do you really want to hear about my sleepless nights and how I sidestep my days as if they were a speeding bullet? Are you curious about the nightmares I try to pass off for daydreams while I chain-smoke on the porch and count the cars that drive past, oblivious to my tortured existence? Shall I ramble on about the scars that mark my flesh, or the ones that blight my soul? Will you listen intently or simply feign interest while I describe the horror story that lies behind each one?
How about I introduce you to my only companions, the ambiguous voices that taunt my every waking hour, remnants of broken promises and dead ambitions? It’s not a pretty picture I paint, are you sure you want to see it? Yes…of course you do. We all slow down and crane our necks to see the accident on the side of the highway, why should you be any different? We wince and gasp but we can’t look away, that’s human nature.
Go ahead, ask your questions and I’ll tell you no lies, but don’t you dare feel sorry for me, I do enough of that for myself and you too. And when I’m finished, don’t tell me you love me and that everything’s going to be ok because we both know that’s a bald-faced lie. There’s no such thing as love, except in fairy tales and Hollywood, not anymore. Things like love and dreams died out when Sexy Sadie perpetrated Charlie’s Helter Skelter on poor Sharon Tate and Woodstock ended. After that, it was all fumbling groping in the back seats of cars illuminated by the dashboard lights while Bob Dylan plucked on his guitar.
You can’t fool me, I know all about love even though I’ve never had it. It’s extinct like the dodo bird and dinosaurs. Yeah, sure, people still use the word, but now it’s about as meaningful as a tampon and just as disposable. So too with the word forever, because we all know forever really only lasts a week or a month, maybe a year or two if you‘re really infatuated, but there’s no more “’Til death do us part.“ Are you still here? Well, sit down then, get comfy and let me pour you a drink, it’s going to be a long night…